belief?

hello. i'm feeling rather guilty that i haven't been around this place for quite some time... well, i was almost going to blog about our wonderful graces camp but i have no idea how to upload truckloads of photos onto blogger, so i guess i'll hopefully try and do one soon! (note ambiguity of the word 'soon' XD) Well, we had a FABULOUS TIME though!! HOHO ROCK ON 406'07!!!

anyway, i guess the real reason why i'm blogging obviously isn't because i'm just here to update about my rather boring life (it's not boring to me, but rather boring to list out)... there's of course the matter of something very important that's coming in approximately 16 more days...

yep, you got it: SYF (bolded, italiced, and red to boot)

I know everyone's been rather doubtful and afraid about the possibility of us not clinching GwH this year. I guess that's why i want to talk about something that's important to me, and perhaps to everyone else as well - belief.

What is belief? How does our belief influence us?

Well, it's something that everyone thinks they have but not something that they hold for long. Somehow in one way or another we always think we strongly believe in so many things. But in the end, we somehow falter and start 'adapting' certain beliefs when we aren't so certain about how these beliefs can benefit us in the way others see ourselves.

Throw away all these kinds of 'surface' beliefs along the way as you approach the 3rd of april. (i refuse to use the word superficial >.<) Because you cannot afford to just worry about little things; you're not in the right mindset to go for SYF if you think that you're afraid of losing the GwH title only because you're worried about how other COs might view your orchestra. Surely SYF goes beyond the appearance? *hopeful smile* Think about your belief. What do you really look for in SYF? WHY are you going for SYF? Don't falter if you think that your beliefs don't make you 'right' to go for SYF. Because all you need to do now is think big; think about the enormous family you're in called nanyang girls' high school chinese orchestra. Why are you doing this? WHY put yourself through endless practices? Surely it's NOT because you're afraid of ruining your perfect attendance or you're worried about your CCA grade at the end of the year? Don't worry, there is nothing wrong with having these beliefs or thinking of them as important and true to you, they are, to some extent, important to me too. :) But you have to make the effort to hunt deep within them for the real belief which we all have.











As cliche as this sounds,
it all comes down to love, doesn't it?


It gives the drive. It makes people do incredible things, like go through lunch practices every single day without complaint. Or practise till your entire body screams for you to stop, and still continue. Love continues to make magic twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week.

And love can make magic 15 days from now, on the 3rd of April, 1.30pm, on the stage, in Singapore Conference Hall.

Search within yourself. You have it in you to make it happen. We all have it in us to make it happen.






nyco-

Just believe.

WHEEE

WHEEEEEEE

as quoted from maureen, today is my second day of my 16th year. :)

OH DEAR, i sound so old suddenly! HAHA.

wait, cancel that.

i sound so MATURE :)

(unfortunately, i still have the intellect of a FIVE YEAR OLD even if i am 16)

HO HO HO.

i am 16!

16!

I CAN NOW WATCH NC16 MOVIES WITHOUT HAVING TO SNEAK IN! (heh heh heh)
haha okay fine, as jasmine says, i still have to sneak in to m18 movies. oh, and r21 ones as well! ;)

btw, i was just thinking, but if zeeNUT and i were to go to a nc16 movie together, people would probably only ask for MY ic, seeing my height. (don't you dare gloat, zeenatan! HAHAHA)

OH YES, in just 2 weeks or so, it will be YANG YU HSUAN'S BIRTHDAY AS WELL! :D
wahaha, we will both be the oldest of our section ;)

okay, i shall now move on to a very dramatic thank you cum recount session XD

first, i will like to thank:

my sis for that wonderful stuffed horse

and chunhing for the stuffed horse that we tortured during class,

and karene for the adorable bear,

and jingwei for that baby stormtrooper toy that crawled over my table, amidst much laughter. Makes you wonder how Vader's army came about. HAHAHA

and irene for the VERY, VERY, BIG rabbit :) you'll be glad to know that my cellobass section was extremely excited to see the original one grow up in a matter of 3 years (you gave me the small on in sec 1) afterall, it's sort of their mascot and (NOT) their lunch. HAHAHA.

yiling: OH LOOK BUNNY EVOLVED!

yang: OH, DINNER!

and fausty for her free and absolutely delectable pancake, and her present (the return of the bunny suicides or something like that, haha) which she will present to me in five year's time,

and of course zeena and irene for their *cough* very wonderful, CHRISTMAS present,

Zeena: WE DECIDED TO GIVE YOU AN...




UNBAKED CHRISTMAS CAKE!

*jiaying looks into bag and sees FLOUR, SUGAR, BAKING CHOCOLATE, CANDY CANE, COLOURFUL SPRINKLES..... *

Rebecca: Hey, where are the eggs?

Jiaying: yeah! Zeena, where are the eggs?

Zeena (in a pouty manner) : YOU CAN BUY THEM YOURSELF!

and zeena, irene, and marissa for celebrating my birthday by eating ICECREAM after school in my ABSENCE (YOU HORRIBLE PEOPLE, i had CCA! you could have done it today or something! humphh)

and 406 for their wonderful card! :):) sorry to 406 about saying that the front of the card looked tombstones, because it really did seem like that from far away to me. O.o HAHA. but now that i think of it, the whole milestones idea on the card is really cool, so THANK YOU! XD

and my CELLOBASS BATCHMATES for their CARD!! hahaha YILING I AM MISSING A HAND on my card! O.o HAHAHAHAHA. and what was it you said was written inside the card that would make me happy? *looks around*

and yang, yanqi, maureen, and yiling for the wonderfully enthusiastic birthday song!

and of course 406 for the equally enthusiastic birthday song! :):)

and of course the wonderful 1.25 litres box of Chocolate Obsession flavoured icecream with candles from my mum. (i didn't eat the candles, don't worry)

OH, and not to forget all the sweet birthday wishes from all of you! (you know who you are!)

and that concludes my VERY FABULOUS AND WONDERFUL 16th birthday. :)

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU FOR MAKING IT SO FABULOUS AND WONDERFUL! :) (and you and you and you too!) :)

Signing off,

A VERY HAPPY GIRL :)

Back from camp

I'm officially back from CO camp. though i wish i'd never left! The thought of already partaking in my very last CO camp is so queer. Funny how people go through a 'down' after they've had a high. I'm having CO camp withdrawal symptoms *arghh*. I just wish i could do everything again, silly as it sounds! Seriously, i don't even mind taking part in huibao again. But even if we do come back as Specially Invited Guest Performers it's just going to feel so different. : Every event that passes by just serves to remind you that whatever you are doing is the last that you'll ever do... 'This is my last CO concert.' Then it's the 'This is my last time as a junior'. In 3 months time it'll be the 'This is the last time i'll take part in SYF in nyco.'

Soon we'll all go 'This is my last performance with nyco'.

Then the most dreaded 'This is the last time I will be in m4o1 as a member of this orchestra'

And you're out.

GAHHH how i wish i never had to think about all these! :(

sigh.

enough of all these ranting!

anyway i've recently realized that unlike most people, I don't really post any recounts on my life on my blog. hahaha i'm not thinking of recounting my life everyday (especially since it's somewhat boring and unexciting) so i'll just post those that i want to remember.

Well, here goes! ;)

18 DECEMBER, COMMITTEE CAMP

We went to the MINT! I can't remember what that stands for (museum of something nostalgia of toys) but it's a toy museum! It's GREAT. I felt like a kid all over again when i was there. It's simply AMAZING how the toys on display hold so much history within them. And i don't mean history in the sense of memories of the childhood days (most of the toys were never played with before) but in the sense of how toys can actually mark a particular era in time.

Like for example, there was this entire wall dedicated to JUST toy robots. and according to our guide, there was this fascination with robots that began with the iconic Robby The Robot in -whatwasthatmoviecalledagain?-. It's so fantastic, just a single robot was duplicated in many different countries and came out so similar but so different. OH YES, it's really cool the way the price of a toy can go up by three to ten times its original price all because it retains the BOX that it came with. Especially because many of us throw away the box and keep the toy.

OH YES the artwork on the boxes are simply beautiful. They aren't at all like the gaudy packaging that most of our toys have today. Most of the boxes are in somewhat pastel-ish, muted colours that are even more beautiful when aged by time.

Another exciting thing! There were original POSTERS for the STAR WARS movies 1, 2 and 3 on display!!!! DATING ALL THE WAY BACK THEN. AHHHH! Maureen helped me to take a couple of pictures but i don't have them yet. But hopefully i'll post them soon! Anyway apparently one way to tell whether the poster's real or not is by checking if there are any fold marks. (I know this sounds weird, because a normal person would rather buy a poster in perfect mint condition) Still, people back then folded the posters and mailed them to the cinemas to be put up, so the fold marks are inevitable. And it's really important to check that the poster's original especially because it's so easy to buy a good printer and scanner and duplicate it.

And if you're thinking whether it's possible to fake toys (e.g. a toy car) from 50 years ago, it's almost impossible to do so... things like the colour of aged red paint can't be faked at all, and creating moulds of the original will most of the time generate toys that are one size smaller. etc etc etc!

ahhh that was a wonderful visit, highly recommended! Be prepared to fork out at least $7 for the entrance fee though... (anyone 203/306 people interested in going there for a class outing? i wouldn't mind going again. In fact, i would love to go again! XD)

yep so after that the entire committee happily returned to school, rested for a while, before having a 2-hour long talk together... we were all told to write down on a slip of paper a problem/difficulty that we've had since we took on our post. or any other random problem. Then we exchanged these slips and took turns reading them out and trying to solve them. Hmm, i personally thought that that exercise was a really helpful one. :) especially since all of us were incredibly open since the teachers weren't around. kudos to yiling and maureen! :) and to all the people who gave me their advice. :)

a shower and dinner and two movies followed after that. (many thanks to chewie for ordering the food! :D and huiyi and cherie for hauling all the food up four storeys! :D) We watched a jap movie, 'Be With You', and part of a french movie, 'Amelie' (we watched this during last year's lit through the senses sabbatical! =D) Both movies were GREAT! even though Be With You was somewhat illogical it was really touching and beautiful. Japan is just so, so, BEAUTIFUL. and i'm surprised that i understood random little bits and pieces of the japanese spoken.. hmm, fausty's and irene's frequent jap monologue-cum-lessons must be starting to rub off a little on me. ;)

After that the wonderfully sensible chinese orchestra committee went off to sleep unanimously. ;)

and woke up the next morning unanimously as well. HAHA.

19 DECEMBER, DAY ONE OF CHINESE ORCHESTRA CAMP

after a breakfast of Milo and biscuits, members of the rest of the chinese orchestra started drifting in. YANG IS BACK! HAHAH i guess all of us were a little overexcited to see her especially since she'd be away for so long. ;) jasmine started performing her usual ritual of jumping on yang and poking her and spraying the lemon air refreshener and applying all sorts of newly improvised tortures on yang to show her love for her fellow batchmate. HAHAHAHAHAH. poor yang, we all feel so sorry for you!

OH and THANK YOU YANG for all the yummy food you've brought back from taiwan just for us! ;)

then we all hurriedly unpacked our cellos and yanqi and i started helping yang to learn libertango at top speed. believe it or not, it was the first time she was trying out the score! it's really cool how the pressure of something like a performance on the same day (e.g. huibao) can make a person push herself to learn really fast!

Then it was DA ZU! And for the first time in many holiday practices, EVERYONE was present!! ;) can't tell you how rare that is. haha!

and then it was lunch.

and then it was XIAOZU!

miracles of miracles! MR LEE TURNED UP for the one-and-a-half-hour of xiaozu! :):)

unfortunately he wasted 20 minutes of that trying to get us to attend the Marsiling CO concert that was coming up in a week or so... even though all of us were obviously dying to start practising libertango.

and guess what he said after that?

Mr Lee: okay, let's move on to your syf set piece. (a.k.a jian kuai de liang feng)

the entire section: WHAT?!

Jiaying: Mr Lee! Huibao is in one hour and 10 minutes and we just wasted 20 minutes hearing you talk about Marsiling CO!

Mr Lee: Oh, okay sure. What huibao piece are you all playing?

rest of section (horrifiedly): WHAT?!?!

Someone: MR LEE!!!! how can you not know?!?!

Jiaying: It's libertango.

Mr Lee: Oh, okay. Then we play libertango.

HAHAHAH up till now i have no idea whether he was joking about not knowing what piece we were playing! gah. but how can he not know?!?! sigh. or maybe he really loves giving our section near- heart attacks. HAHA. XD But after that he did a pretty good job of last minute xiaozu touchups so he is forgiven. :P:P

and after that CAME THE HUIBAO!

Sec ones were in the 3rd item, and sec 2s and 3s plus qianwen were in the 9th item. Gosh i don't know why but when i saw that the sec ones had finished the entire song without collapsing halfway i just felt like tearing. O.o especially since they only started being able to play together on huibao day itself.

anyway i'm just really, really, really happy that they made it for their first ever performance. :) CONGRATS to dawn, libin, jiawen, and qianwen for making it to the end! :):) HAHAHA you all must be glad that you didn't have to go solo like i did when i was sec one. XD

*glares at jolene* :P (sec 3s, you all know what happened. HAHAHA)

anyway, continue to aim towards getting into SYF!

and libertango was much faster that expected, haha! i guess we were all so nervous. but that's okay because i'm just really happy that we managed to put it up after 3 sectionals for the cellos and 2 for the basses. :):) at first mrs ee wasn't too pleased at our performance (according to her she was expecting to hear at least the standard we reached during concert) but after hearing how we put it up in such a short period of time she looked pretty impressed and said that she now had to change all her comments! XD HAHAHA. and not to mention how yang learned the song in just a single day! ;)

WE ROCK. all of us!

after that we went for a shower and a delectable dinner. Dawn, libin, qianwen and jiawen were talking much more than usual during dinner! (in fact, throughout the day) :) I'm really happy that we're all opening up to each other and getting to know each other better. :):) now it seems like when we have random conversations, there's barely this senior-junior gap (with the exception of occasional senior-junior bullying sessions etc) and we're all really open about what we talk about. :)

and next was the NIGHT WALK! HAHAHAH i don't know whether to say that it was disappointing or hilarious really. I was stationed beneath one of the tables in one of the art rooms alone with a cherie's torchlight, my handphone, and my spraying thingum for company. I was supposed to spray the legs of the people passing by (i know this sounds obscene but it isn't) and guess what? People started turning on the lights, so the art room didn't seem scary at all. I had to pop out from under the table, demand why the lights were on, before spraying a couple of people and promptly turning off the lights. HAHAHAHAHA :P and groups started congregating together because they all got stuck somewhere before our station so it was harder for them to be afraid, because there were so many people in the first place. haha! cellobass was the only group that didn't turn on the lights. :) yiling and maureen managed to tell them in time not to turn on the lights... (even if they did i would see it and promptly scold them, heh heh!)

and guess what? they entered the WRONG room. HAHAHA. XD

haha so i guess we (and the rest of the stationmasters) were kinda disappointed that we didn't get to scare anyone properly, boo hoo hooo! some of us got scared instead. HAHA. i'm just really thankful that our station was in the art rooms because i'm used to the place so i wouldn't scare myself silly too easily. :P

okay i shall blog about the rest of the yesterday and today tomorrow! my mum's sleeping already, got to get off the computer. BYE!

P.S. For some obscure reason i usually get more and more high while writing a post O.o how queer!
P.P.S. HEHEHE. :)

THE RESULTS

HELLO THERE, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!

As of yesterday, 7pm, this week's competition has officially ended. Let's have our mystery picture up here again...

AHHHH, how fascinatingly obscure it looks. SO, WHAT IS IT?!?!

Well, before i move on to declare the identity of this obscure thingum and the winner of this equally obscure competition, let's have a round of applause as we welcome all our contestants up on stage once again!

and HERE with have, contestant NUMBER ONE, FAUSTINA LIM YAN PING!

Her entry:

"UHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. IT IS AN UH....... the bottom right corner of your computer with something? Aiya. I KNOW I KNOW. ................................It's your HEAD! XD" (haha) to irritate you: あの絵はあなたの馬鹿頭だ。（笑）あ！違う、ね！ハハ！次ぎ会ったら、殺さないでくださいよ！（笑）！！

How... How.. fascinating. The host of this mystery picture competition will like to comment that although she is extremely honoured by the mention of her absolutely wonderful head in the second statement, the third statement is indeed not as flattering as the aforementioned second statement.

*gives fausty The Evil Eye*

AND NEXT, we have..... CONTESTANT NO. 2, The Lovable Laiweng!

Her entry:

"it is something to do with your tablet! xD"

ahhhh, the phrase "your tablet" really helps to relieve the trauma that the poor host of this mystery picture competition had suffered after reading the previous entry. Therefore Laiweng deserves the prefix 'lovable', because she knows how to make the host of this mystery picture competition happy. That earns her bonus points. :D

(*rest of audience throws carrots on stage*
The Host: HEY, even judges are allowed to be biased, okay? humph!)
*brushes off a tiny carrot from her shoe*

Let's move on with CONTESTANT NUMBER 3...

(kindly be a good audience and do a nice drumroll, thank you...)
*ducks the onslaught of another carrot*

PHUA YANQI!

and here is her entry:

"it is an alien! HAHAHA. and it has eyes. ;DDDD and smart ah jiaying. go google translator. HAHAH."

though her entry may seem highly nonsensical and also hold logical fallacies ("it has eyes, therefore it is an alien!"), it still holds truths that can be easily proven right, e.g. "smart ah jiaying". :) WAHAHAHA.

*audience proceeds to hurl multicoloured carrots*

*one bright pink carrot bounces off the head of The Host*

OW! Can we please move on? And LAST BUT NOT LEAST, we have CONTESTANT No. 4, the one and only LIM YILING!

Her entry:

"okay. HELLO! i think it is your mouth.so big and BLUEEE. eee jiaying, rmb to brush your teeth next time. "

HUMPH. Does this week's mystery picture REALLY resemble part of me?! sigh. i insist, my mouth was and never will be BLUE. it's currently bright green you know! humph. and i do brush my teeth, mind you! Or my mouth would have been purple with white stripes. -.-

WELL, i have presented to you ALL the CONTESTANTS for this mystery picture competition. SO WHO IS CORRECT?













humph! actually, no one is correct.

*audience groans audibly*
*host gives The Evil Eye to the audience*





how saddening, i can't believe that NO ONE GUESSED THE CORRECT ANSWER!!!





well, it's just a... a...

stapler. -.-

THE ORIGINAL PICTURE

Well, that's all folks, TUNE IN NEXT WEEK for the next episode of The Mystery Picture Competition, thank you!

P.S. the hint is at the bottom of the page. can't believe no one found it, BOO HOO HOOO :(

MYSTERY PICTURE OF THE WEEK

WELCOME visitor!

after a short hiatus by the blog creator, she has decided to launch the ALL NEW MYSTERY-PICTURE-OF-THE-WEEK contest.

Well, all you have to do is to make an intelligent guess on WHAT the picture-of-the-week is! (and when i say intelligent, i do mean intelligent, please don't say POOP when the picture is obviously of a delectable lollipop XD)

Still, creative answers are absolutely welcome. :) (e.g. that's not a lollipop, that's a stripey marshmallow hardened and dumped in the centrifuge!) (okay, that's to the point of moronic already but i can't think of anything now. HEH HEH.)

No tangible prizes will be rewarded, but the most creative and/or accurate answers will deserve a mention on the next post. The competition will end in two days on the 15th of December, Friday, 7pm.

WELL, are you ready, Visitor?

then have a look at what's below!





HINT: it's deliberated inverted, pixelised, and facing the wrong way. :) that is enough hinting for you to try doing some things to it so that it will look more familiar. WAHAHA.


OH YES! before i forget, there is a hint lying somewhere around this blog to help you too!


HAVE FUN! :)

The Tablet

MY DAD FINALLY PROMISED TO GET ME A TABLET. :)

YES!!!! *PUNCHES FIST INTO AIR*

Will be getting a GRAPHIRE 3. Graphire 4's already out but i don't mind getting 3, esp since it's probably below $100 by now. Or maybe around there. :) will probably have to share it will my sis though. But that ain't gonna matter. :) we'll have fun together!

Dad's going to drop by Sim Lim to take a look at it today!

WHAT I WILL DO THE MOMENT I GET MY GRAPHIRE

Step 1. Unwrap the Graphire
Step 2. Hug it, and throw it a million or so flying kisses
Step 3. Caress it gently, before setting it down on my computer table on top of a down cushion, then connecting it to the computer
Step 4. Wave goodbye to it for 5 minutes as dad sets up Graphire
Step 5. Shoo away my dad rather unceremoniously, before plonking myself in front of Graphire :)
Step 6. Load photoshop at top speed (in the meantime, double check for any lint on Graphire)
Step 7. Give a pleased sigh as i open a new document, maybe about 500 X 500 pixels
Step 8. Select DA perfect brush, DA perfect colour, then start to draw the outline of-








Step 9. My Graphire?

HAHA, i have absolutely no idea what to get started on. Any suggestions? oh WAIT, maybe i should start drawing my cello. :)

anyway, here's a link to a wonderful Speed Painting video. (thanks melissa!)

CLICK HERE!

It's done in 45 minutes but the artist sped it up to about 10 minutes. HAVE FUN WATCHING!

NOTE: It's done using a WATCOM TABLET. :) wonder if it's my soon-to-be Graphire. HEH.





P.S. Jacqueline Du Pre still ROCKS. Elgar's Concerto's LAST MOVEMENT rocks too! :D
P.P.S. Okay, that's random. But nevermind. I still love her music. :)

Jacqueline Du Pre

I'm listening to the CD maureen lent me a few weeks ago...

MUSIC FROM THE MOTION PICTURE

A FILM BY ANAND TUCKER

HILARY and

JACKIE

composed by

BARRINGTON PHELOUNG

INCLUDES
JACQUELINE DU PRE'S
HISTORIC PERFORMANCE OF
ELGAR'S CELLO CONCERTO



I'm emotionally wrecked now...

(don't worry, i'll get over it)

sigh.

I've been looking up Jacquline Du Pre on wikipedia; reading up on her biography and such.

And my heart feels as if it's ripping apart as i listen to her elgar cello concerto and read about her. (and i say HER cello concerto because she totally OWNS it.)

The heart-wrenching feeling is absolutely queer. i don't know her personally. But i wish i did.

But it's too late. She's gone.

Here are some wiki excerpts for The Visitor's perusement...

i'll be glad to send you her recording as you read. Her music deserves to go on forever. and i do mean forever and ever.

Hilary and Jackie
"Hilary and Jackie is a 1998 movie directed by Anand Tucker and written by acclaimed British screenwriter Frank Cottrell Boyce, starring Emily Watson and Rachel Griffiths as the sisters Jacqueline and Hilary du Pré. The movie is based on Hilary du Pre's book A Genius in the Family, about her sister Jacqueline, an acclaimed cellist...."

"The movie begins with Hilary and Jackie as children being taught by their mother to dance and play musical instruments; cello for Jackie and flute for Hilary. Jackie does not take practising seriously at first, but when she does, she becomes a virtuoso, quickly rising to international prominence......"

"The last quarter of the movie chronicles in painful, graphic detail the last fifteen years of Jacqueline's life, during which she is diagnosed with multiple sclerosis, and as a result loses control of her nervous system, becomes paralyzed, goes deaf and mute, and finally dies as a shell of her former beauty and glory..."

"The film ends with Jacqueline's ghost standing on the beach where she used to play as a child, watching herself and her sister frolicking in the sand as little girls..."

Jacquline Du Pre
"Jacqueline Mary du Pré OBE (January 26, 1945 – October 19, 1987) was an English cellist.
Born in Oxford, Jacqueline du Pré is acknowledged to have been one of the greatest cellists in the world. She had a successful career until the onset of multiple sclerosis which eventually contributed to her tragically early death. "

"Du Pré made her formal debut in March 1961 at the prestigious Wigmore Hall in London, and made her concerto début in 1962 at the Royal Festival Hall playing Edward Elgar's Cello Concerto with the BBC Symphony Orchestra under Rudolf Schwarz..."

"Her performance of the Elgar proved so popular that she subsequently returned to play the concerto three years in succession...In 1965, at the age of 20, she recorded the Elgar Concerto for EMI with the London Symphony Orchestra under Sir John Barbirolli, which brought her international recognition, and which has become the benchmark reference for the work..."

''The recording has never been out of print since its release over forty years ago..."

The Disease
"In 1971, Jacqueline du Pré's playing began an irreversible decline when the artist began to lose sensitivity in her fingers, as well as in other parts of her body..."

"In 1973 du Pré resumed her concert activities, but by this time, the symptoms had become severe. In January 1973 she toured North America and Canada, and some of the concert reviews from that period were less than complimentary...."

"Du Pré later recalled that she had problems judging the weight of the bow, and even opening the cello case had become difficult. As she had lost sensation in her fingers, she had to rely visually, to know where she had to play on the fingerboard. "

"In October 1973 multiple sclerosis was diagnosed, the disease that caused her health to deteriorate until her death in London on October 19, 1987, at the age of 42."

I want to talk about her music. But i can't bring myself to continue. I guess music is like that. Sometimes the deepest emotions can only be expressed through silence.

and maybe a sigh too.

There are some things i'll never understand, and one of them is the way some people who bring joy to others die young and others who bring pain and suffering get to live to a ripe old age. I feel like screaming LIFE'S NOT FAIR but i guess all of us (even if we don't want to admit it) know that already.

gosh. she was special.

WHY WHY WHY!?!

sigh.

all i can say is thank god that yoyoma's still alive and kicking. and i really hope nothing like this will ever happen to anyone else, and that no one will have to suffer the way she did.